Hot Girl Golf: How to Become Rated R-level Sexy

Today’s tea is spicy and straight from the bedroom. It turns out, there absolutely is a secret to becoming irresistibly “Rated R” sexy – both on and off the golf course. So, it seemed fitting to share it with you. And no, this post isn’t about what you might think; it’s entirely safe for work.

In this context, “Rated R” stands for Rested. Achieving our most captivating state of allure as humans starts with engaging in rest. My personal desperation to remedy my horrible relationship with sleep (at first, to be better prepared for our Saturday morning golf rounds) has led me to some sincerely helpful insights. And it all boils down to one truth: prioritizing self-care and sleep strategy is absurdly crucial for enhancing mood, health, wellbeing, and yes, even your golf game.

Unfortunately, I didn’t connect the dots on this front sooner. So many people wear a lack of sleep in the name of productivity as a badge of honor. As a result, my sleep was the last thing I would look at when evaluating how to improve as a human.


  1. Learn Like a Sleep Research Virgin
    I dedicated time to understand sleep better. The approach to learning with an “assume I know nothing” lens, helped me discover how some of my habits were sabotaging my level of rest. Face-in-palm.
  2. What Gets Measured Gets Done
    Our Sleep Number bed trolls me. It tells me my sleep sucks and my heart rate’s also trash. So, I decided to take my scores seriously. The competitive nature in me was activated and now I actually try to protect my sleep score. Things factored into my score:
    1. Time to fall asleep
    2. Hours slept
    3. Restful hours
    4. Number of times entering and exiting the bed
    5. Assessment of feeling rested each morning
  3. Routine Shake Up:
    Here changes I made to my sleep routine to improve my sleep quality:
    • Caffeine Cut-off Time: At 2pm, I bid farewell to caffeinated drinks to avoid and chocolate.
    • Digital Downtime: After 9:30pm, I aim to completely disconnect from all digital devices to prevent blue light from hampering my sleep. I haven’t been great a this over the past month or so as I spend my nights tinkering with Tee Time with Audrey while I rebrand. In times that all goes as planned, It’s been lights out as soon as I get into bed.
    • Melatonin, in Moderation: A small dose of melatonin has been a life saver. I am at 2.5mgs and it’s just right. Prior to really understanding how to find the sweet spot, I had so many vivid dreams. What I imagine ayahuasca-trips to be like. Spare yourself.
    • Consistent Sleep & Wake Routine: Mirroring my respect for being on time to tee times, I established strict sleeping and waking times, significantly helping my internal clock. In theory, these times were great and actually align themselves to my energy levels and general timeline each day. In practice, I deviate and sometimes falling asleep closer to 12am and waking up closer to 8:30am, but it’s already helped so much!
    • Bedside Water Trick: A glass of water by my bed means fewer disruptions since I don’t need to leave bed when I have my trusty emotional support water bottle nearby.
    • Dark Mode & Blue Light Filters: Reducing blue light exposure before bedtime has made falling asleep easier and improved my energy levels. I set auto adjust on the screens so I don’t forget.
    • No Nap Zone: Maintaining energy throughout the day and avoiding naps has stabilized my sleep pattern, aligning with our usual 10 pm(ish) bedtime. Pulling all-dayers is now my fav and sure to result in better sleep.
  4. Invest in Quality Sleep Supplies
    Quality sleep accessories transformed my rest. Lucky for me, my husband took time to research and purchase what ended up being my top 5 fav sleep-enhancing devices.
    • Sleep Number Bed: Colin bought us a Sleep Number bed in August. Next-level sleep ensued.
    • REST Memory Foam Pillow: Cradles your noggin. Solid purchase.
    • Separate Blankets: Adjusting for personal comfort can be a game-changer, as learned when we fell in love with the sleep number bed. There was just one thing, blanket commandeering was a real problem.
    • Cooling Blankets: Essential for those warmer nights and brighter mornings. My cooling blanket is one of the best things Colin ever bought for me. I don’t wake up sweating and it somehow is warm and cooling. Goldilocks approved.
    • Loops: Earplugs that don’t make me feel like I will sleep through an alarm or won’t hear anything else.
    • A Gentle Wake-up Alarm: Colin receives calls around the clock. Choosing a less startling ringer and alarm clock ring made mornings more pleasant.
  5. Hot Girl Walks
    Regular “hot girl walks,” golf rounds, and workouts contribute significantly to my physical readiness for sleep. Read – I’M SO SEEPIE these days. The strategic gameplay of golf has definitely aided in mental decluttering, fostering a conducive state for grade A snoozing that results in being Rated R. It’s somehow a calming game, yet infuriating, and anger-inducing. That’s where the physical exertion leading to being tired and more easily falling asleep comes into play.
  6. Therapy
    Lastly, continuing to leverage therapy in my constant pursuit of mental wellbeing (hot girl mental health post coming later this month) has helped my mind to become quieter. Less noise = more sleep.

Gaining a solid understanding of sleep’s impact has been transformative, underscoring that true vibrancy and appeal stems from being well-rested. Here’s to embracing our “Rated R” selves, where rest anchors us closer to our best selves, both on the green and in our daily lives.

Sweet dreams, you beautiful birdie!